Reality is about to bite for Burnham
IT’S less than a week since MPs dragged themselves back to Westminster from their long summer break but battle lines for a general election are already being drawn.
Kemi Badenoch fired the opening shots for the Tories with a pledge to hack £10billion off the welfare bill and plough it into our cash-strapped Armed Forces.
Just 24 hours later Nigel Farage raised the stakes by unveiling an action plan he claims would stop all migrant boats within 100 days of a Reform victory.
But so far, there has been little from Andy Burnham beyond a handful of minor giveaways and a woolly aim to put “hope in every heart”.
Perhaps he is saving the big stuff for a grand unveiling at Labour’s conference in Liverpool later this month.
If so, he had better make it good, as the Budget on October 28 is increasingly looking like a day of pain.
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Mr Burnham and his Chancellor make a sharply contrasting double act. While the new PM bounces along with Winnie-the-Pooh optimism and positive vibes, John Healey adopts Eeyore’s trademark gloom whenever talk turns to the public finances.
Burnham is fast building a reputation as the man who likes to say yes. But Healey prefers: “Hang on — we can’t afford it.”
That is the uncomfortable truth facing our tax-and-spend PM. There is no money left to spend and those of us in work are already being taxed to the hilt.
Yesterday, the Chancellor offered a distinctly dismal assessment of the road ahead, warning of “tough” measures.
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Turmoil in the Middle East, he said, is hitting growth, inflation and borrowing costs. And jitters over the Budget, combined with the new PM’s Commons debut, have already rattled the bond markets.
The hope Mr Burnham promises will soon turn to despair unless he has more to offer on the big-ticket issues — migration, cost of living, defence and the NHS.
But somebody still has to pay the bill.
And with the Tories and Reform already beating the drums, the PM may discover that good vibes don’t balance the books.
Saatch a challenge
IT MUST be the one of the toughest marketing gigs in history — finding new work for Sir Keir Starmer.
The toppled ex-PM has signed up with talent agency M+C Saatchi as he tries to launch a new career outside politics.
Who knows, perhaps there is a niche market for terminally dull, nasal after-dinner speakers.
Otherwise, to paraphrase the famous Saatchi election advert, it could be a case of “Labour ex-PM isn’t working”.

